Becoming the Harvest
Time and time again I look back on my life and am amazed at the hand of God at work in my life. How many of you know what its like to go through something and in the middle of it you don’t understand what God is doing, but after you’re out of it, it all makes so much sense? I call this the golden thread. One of my favorite ways to honor God is by identifying how he has weaved all of my life together perfectly.
I believe in my heart when we developed eyes that see God in everything, the more He will seemingly show up. I sometimes cannot even fathom, or merely describe, the intricate details of how He works all things out for good in my life. I’ve been living in a season of full circles. The only way I can describe it is feels like He is tying up all the loose ends in my life, bringing a certain season of my life to end and opening doors for my future. What a beautiful reality to be in. Which leads me to this very moment. Over the weekend I attended a Leadership Conference with my boss. Here I had the privilege of sitting under some really incredible leaders from around the country. The opening speaker shared a message focused on four things: Purpose, passion, vision, calling.
These aren’t words that are new to me, in fact I would boldly say I live each of those out very well. My purpose is to love Jesus and point people to Him. My passion is loving Jesus and pointing people to Him. My vision is, you guessed it, Jesus. And my calling in this season of life, is to once again, love Jesus and point people to Him. It’s quite simple. And frankly I like it that way.
But as this speaker went on discussing these things, she began encouraging everyone in the room to identify a word that they can hang on to for the upcoming year. Once again, this verbiage wasn’t new to me because this is something I have done with my own family year after year. And as she spoke, I ever so gently felt the Holy Spirit tug on that all too familiar golden thread in my life. Following that leading I began searching my phone looking for the words I documented over the last few years.
I was able to trace back all my words from 2022 through 2026. This was the very first time that I stopped and looked at each of those words together and as I reflected on each word and what that season of life entailed, I was undone. What a God that He would give me a word to carry me through each season of life! Oh, how I need a word from the Lord to hold on to. What else is there to hold onto? Nothing. Man will fail, advice will fail, books will fail, knowledge will fail. But His word will never. Never, ever, ever. It will never return void. And looking back in my life, at these 5 words, I really began to see that.
Identity. Boldness. Dwell. Pushback. Harvest. As I reflected on these words the Lord gave me a beautiful visual to describe His intent in my life over the last 4 years. This visual, takes each word and season of life and shows me the beautiful process that the Lord has had me in all along. Perfectly leading me to where I am now.
Identity- A seed. In 2022, I joined the CHASSM. (Catalyst Houston Area School of Supernatural Ministries) I had just came back to my faith about 4 months prior, after having my first child Joel. I had no idea what this school was or what it would entail, but the words they used to promote it was enough to drawn me in. “Come and discover your royal identity” they said. Identity was always something I lacked, but becoming a mom made me lose myself even more.
CHASSM really did catapult me into identity. By developing a lifestyle of discipleship, spending lots of time with Jesus, and learning the word of God for the first time, I began conforming into the very one whose image I was made in. Understanding Him, helped me see me! Getting rid of the extra stuff that did not look like Him was easy. His love was like nothing I had ever experienced before. How can you come to know His character and nature and not be undone for a lifetime? I was mesmerized then, but since then it has just gotten better and better.
In Genesis 1 when God is creating grass and herb that yields seed, and fruit trees that yields fruit, it says over and over that “it yielded fruit according to its kind, whose seed is in itself” (Genesis 1:11-13) As I was reflecting on my word from 2022, the Lord showed me a seed and gave me this scripture. This year of identity, was really me identifying the seed who was in me. He revealed that I was the fruit after His kind. Made in His perfect image. The core of my identity is centered around His.
Boldness - Planted. Entering into 2023 a Holy boldness came upon me. And thank God it did because I would really need it. When the Lord gave me this word on January 1st of 2023, He specifically told me this would be a year that I would learn how to pray bold prayers. When I received this word, I didn’t know what was to come. I had just gotten married to my husband and was freshly pregnant with our youngest son, Lucas, and at that point he was perfectly healthy and growing. In 9 short months from then, we would find out that he had a rare genetic liver disease that affected many organs in his body. Including his heart. It was through this season that I would hold on to this word and pray incredibly bold prayers.
Prayers like “Lord you split the sea, I know you can widen these arteries in my son’s heart so that the blood can pass through” which He did. Or prayers like “Lord you are the creator of my son’s DNA, you can change it, and take this disease away” and again, He did. And my favorite prayer we saw the Lord answer “the doctors say it will take 2 weeks for this brain infection to go away, but we pray it would take 2 days” In 2 days it was gone! Above all though, the boldest prayer that I ever prayed was “Lord I trust you with my heart, I trust that you will turn this all for good, so have your way whatever it may look like.”
This was the year that I boldly went into the ground to die and be buried like the seed in whose image I now bore. This was the year I surrendered everything. At times it felt like death, like the crushing was too much to bear. Oh how the darkness was overwhelming at times. But now, I can see that this was the year I was planted.
Dwell - Watered. In 2024, the pain and suffering didn’t end. It would actually peak during this time. The weariness and exhaustion would begin setting in. By March of this year, we would spend 23 consecutive days in the hospital with Lucas. He would experience not one, but two spinal taps, endless blood draws and Iv placements over this time. 3 weeks of no sleep, missing my family, and fighting against fear of what was to come. How good is God though, that in these 3 weeks I would learn to take communion daily. I would spend hours in worship, prayer and in the Word. It was by His mysterious grace that I got to live out the word He gave me. I learned to dwell in His presence even in places and spaces that didn’t feel safe or comfortable. In this time, He alone gave me strength and rest. He carried me as a mother through this hardest time of my life. He became my dwelling place, and my refuge.
The peace that came during this time was unexplainable. The day Lucas was hospitalized was my 25th birthday, at first I was so sad to not be celebrating with my family and friends, but I would soon realize that God gave me the greatest gift possible— time to encounter His presence. It was as if He paused the world and allowed me time to dwell with Him and in Him. What started as a serious, and terrifying hospital stay, turned into one full of miracles, and angelic visitations. (Yes, literally) I spent 3 weeks praying over our nurses, doctors, and fellow patients. I would fill the atmosphere with worship and prayer, I would write prophetic letters to my hospital room neighbors. The Lords presence changed everything for me during this time. I learned to stay in His rest even when the space I was in did not allow rest.
3 days after being released from the hospital my husband and I, along with our two boys, would be in a 4 car pile up on the freeway. Our small car would be totaled as we were sandwiched in between 2 large vehicles. I never would have imagined something like this would happen to my family, but it was apparent that the Lord protected us in this moment. Though most windows in the car were shattered, not one shard of glass would touch my husband, myself or our kids. And I’ll never forget how right across the street there was a construction site with live excavators that distracted my 3 year old from the terrifying wreck we just endured.
I should look back at this time in my life and see the trauma that I experienced. But the truth is, when I look back at this season of life, I see how the Lord watered me in the secret place. How He flooded me with His presence and how I drank deeply from His well. Dwelling in His presence carried me through the darkest hour of my life. It was in this year that He watered the seed that was planted the year before.
Pushback- Rooted.The word the Lord gave me for 2025 was pushback. The word was 2 fold. I felt the Lord preparing me that this year I would face pushback, but that I needed to push back against it. In January of this year, I was still battling repercussions of my son’s diagnosis. All the trauma he had experienced in his short little life was beginning to peak. We were in physical therapy and occupational therapy weekly, trying to undo the medical trauma he experienced over the last year and a half.
By faith I knew God could turn this all around– that I didn’t have to let all the pushback we were feeling take us down. And so the war began. I pushed back against the trauma trying to keep my son from walking in the healing God promised. I pushed back physically, emotionally and spiritually. Satan would not have his way in my life or my sons. I used every spiritual tool in my tool belt and applied every bit biblical wisdom that I knew. I spent time dreaming with God, imagining what my son’s healing would look like because I knew that if I could see it, I could have faith to believe for it.
The trauma made it really hard for my son to eat solids. Out of fear of something being forced onto him his body would suppress its appetite. This was one of the hardest battles we faced because there seemed to be no winning this war. I felt stuck in the “wilderness.” This was a word I would use to describe this season time and time again.
In January of that year I attended the Dwell conference and heard a song that changed my life. The lyrics went like this, “I know the end of this story, I’ll come out of the wilderness leaning on my beloved” This song built my faith, and gave me the hope I needed to push back against the pushback. I would then be lead to read the story of Jesus’ encounter in the wilderness in Matthew 4. To my amazement I realized it was the Holy Spirit who drew Jesus into the wilderness to be tested. I quickly realized that is what I was experiencing. The Lord allowed me experience this season of the wilderness because he had a work to do in me. And if I did it right, I would walk out of this wilderness leaning on Him, my beloved.
I’m going to be honest and say, this process took a lot longer than it should have. I went through a couple months of pushback that I allowed take over me. When I finally came to my senses and remembered the word the Lord gave me, I snapped out of it. The Lord did a deep deep work in me over this time that forever changed my life. Which is a story for another time, but trust that it is coming soon.
I can now happily say, I did come out of the wilderness and I AM leaning on my Beloved. Does that mean my life looks perfect and amazing right now? No, not at all. But the season of wilderness forced me to put some roots down. Which first required a breaking open, and an uprooting of what was not rooted in Him. This was incredibly painful but incredibly necessary.
The only way I could then begin to push back against anything was if I was deeply rooted. You see, the roots required for this season and those in front of me need to be deep and connected to true substance, something that will actually anchor me. The surface level stuff wont work anymore. I needed to be rooted in the right things. In HIM. Because anything else will fail me.
Which leads to me my word for 2026: Harvest:
Harvest. My grandmother once told me, the word of God is living seed and living seed brings forth fruit in its season. Well friends, this is that season. This year will be a year of harvest. Where the mature seeds that have been scattered, watered and increased by the Lord will come to fruition. Both in my life and in the lives of others around me. I see a great wave of Harvest sweeping across the city and the nation. Harvest is coming to the church– who is the bride of Christ! What was once rooted in shallow dirt will now be deeply rooted and connected to living water. The harvest will be bountiful and JESUS will get all the glory. He will receive the reward of His suffering, and the harvest of His Labor. Hallelujah!
